The short answer: Schedule presence like a commitment, keep it like one, and grade it like one. The standard in this brand: be the man your kids feel by Wednesday — present and dependable in the middle of the ordinary week, not just at the events.
Presence is not proximity
A body in the house is not a father present. Presence is attention: the phone down, the eyes up, the patience available at 7 PM on a Tuesday. Kids don't grade intentions; they grade what they feel, and they feel it by Wednesday — midweek, tired, unfiltered.
Make it a commitment
What gets scheduled gets kept. Put presence on the scorecard: the meal at the table, the game, the conversation, the bedtime. It feels mechanical for about a week. Then it becomes the thing your kids can count on — which is the entire definition of dependable.
The stake
Frankie J became a father at 22 determined his kids wouldn't start where he started. Presence is where that determination either becomes real or stays a speech. His motivation, in his words: his son way ahead of where he started. That's the whole thing.
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